Not long ago, I mentioned that I’ve been going through a “break up” with a former high school friend. I’ve blocked her Facebook page so she can’t find me through there. Last week, I took another step: I blocked her from seeing my activity on a messenger service that I use. Even if I’m online, it will look as though I’m not. That way, she won’t try and contact me. I took it a step further last night: I preemptively blocked her email address from a current one that I’m using. If she ever finds that address, she won’t be able to contact me.
It’s slow going and it hurts. Primus, does it ever hurt. There is twenty-six years of history between us; tossing that away is painful. But I know it’s something that has to be done. This has been building for quite some time and I’ve known that it is best for me to let her go.
Her pattern has been obvious for a while: be sweet and friendly at first, then once I’ve dropped my guard she’ll start the attacks. Then afterwards she’ll go back to being sweet and friendly again. This was what she was rather obviously doing on my old blog, for when she wrote her diatribe about me, she started posting sweet and friendly comments on my posts. If you hadn’t known any better, you’d have absolutely no idea what she had said about me. Which is rather typical of her; she’ll say terrible things about someone behind his or her back, then hug that same person the moment she sees them in a public locale. I should know as she’s done this exact same thing to me more than once.
And I can’t deal with it. I just can’t anymore.
The other steps will be far more difficult for me. Do I dare block her email from my main email address? Do I ban her from my old blog? (There are apparently ways of doing that; Google is your friend in that regard.) Do I stop checking her blog completely? I’m still unsure. This is the first time I’ve undertaken such an endeavor and I’m not sure how I should do all of this. I’m still learning.
Too bad this is something that I never wanted to learn in the first place.